Wednesday, September 26, 2012

A Confession

On 9/14, I received the great news that the tumors in my liver were stable during a 9:30AM appointment with Dr. S. I drove from that appointment down to St. Peter's to see Dr. McElrath, my oncology surgeon, with the windows down and the music up. It was a great drive down and I thought my appointment would be a quick check and he would transfer my care back up to my doctors in Glens Falls.

Instead, he came into the room with the news that he was concerned that the radiation and chemotherapy had not done their job. That the cancer in my cervix was not cured. That the treatment which works for the vast majority of patients may not have been effective for me, and that I may need a hysterectomy.

My response: I laughed. I did. Because...seriously what are the chances? Oh wait, it is me. I should have known better. I had three hours of feeling pretty good about the direction things were going with my treatments and then, crash.

Fast forward to today when I saw Dr. McElrath and Duncan again. They did a visual check and they both felt a little better about how things are looking, but have decided that in about four weeks that Dr. M will do a biopsy and those results will then determine if I need surgery. I am hopeful that the surgery is not necessary - both because I want the cervical cancer to be gone, but also because tissue that has been treated with radiation does not heal as well as normal tissue and there can be some very serious side effects to the surgery. As always, I remain hopeful.

In other news, the St. Peter's radiation oncology department now has a new rule, known internally as the Murphy Rule, about checking blood counts before internal radiation treatments. I was also told repeatedly by the staff that they were unlikely to forget me. Again, I had to laugh...as I said to them, I know I was a difficult patient, but unintentionally so.

3 comments:

frieda said...

You are unique.

Suzanne, I do not understand. I do know you make it a policy to not reply, so maybe in another post you can answer: IF a hysterectomy is likely to help, why didn't they do that instead of radiation/chemo? Although surgery sucks with great suckitude this one is routine enough that many women endure it and live more or less normal lives. Please help me understand why this is not an option already explored. Apologizing for this thickness, Frieda

Beth said...

Suzanne - I'm sorry you were dealing with this while we were there laughing, joking, and relishing in the good news we'd just heard... I'm sorry you're continuing to experience such a roller coaster ride of good and bad news... My thoughts are with you and I pray that they figure this out.

angela said...

Postive thoughts always, Positve thoughts that the biopsy will show that the cervical cancer is gone as well. It stinks you could only get a good three hours in! And you are You, that is truer than true, there is no one alive that is Youer than you... Outlier all the way baby!