Expectant parents and new parents get a lot of (unsolicited) advice, at least I know Kelly and I did. One of the most common refrains was to "Enjoy every moment, it goes by too fast." For me, that advice is compounded because my time with my children will be much shorter than it should be, than I want it to be.
Here is the kicker that all parents know...parenting is hard. It is hard to enjoy every moment as one child is trying to go head first down the stair from the family room to the porch while another is using super whiny voice to ask for more juice (without a please, I might add), and the third is singing poopie poopie pee pee at the top of his lungs. It is at such moments I look at the clock and calculate the hours until bedtime.
But then, every now and then, in the midst of the chaos, something happens. Kyan stops his frantic dancing and bends down to give Crosby a kiss and a toy while calling him "little buddy;" Rory looks at Kelly and says, without any prompting, thanks for making me dinner, daddy; Crosby lights up when I walk into the room. Those moments...those are the ones I savor. Enjoying every moment is too hard, too unrealistic, too impossible to obtain. So I keep my eyes open for those little glimmers, little moments that remind me how sweet parenting can be, even when there are still 10 hours and 43 minutes until bedtime...
5 comments:
"Every moment goes by too fast" was not true from birth to age one and a half, which was torture. She spent most of the first year screaming. I will never, EVER tell a new or expecting parent that, because it left me wracked with guilt that I wasn't "enjoying the beautiful time" when she was on hour 5 of relentless screeching. (Yes, she was healthy, yes I took her to a doctor, yes I did this that and the other thing that "always" prevents colic. Until she could talk, all bets were off.)
But, dammit, now it all IS going fast. And now, as a healthy person, I confess that I cuddle Rosalie all the more knowing how lucky I am that I am, for the foreseeable future, healthy.
Last week I was in a bit of a mood and my son was being a teenaged smarty-pants, plus I'd told him five times to unload the dishwasher. And I lost it and yelled at him. I very rarely do this, so he looked at me funny and asked, "Why are you being such a bitch?"
My blood boiled a bit, but then I took a breath and apologized to him for losing my temper. And then insisted he empty the dishwasher.
Kids push limits and it's hard for us very human parents. But even those moments are among the best in our journey of parent/child relationships.
And the "poopie, poopie pee pee" thing made me laugh out loud. :)
Perfectly said! Those little special moments are the ones to savor <3
This is so true, you cant savor everything, but those sweet moments make it so worth it! It is hard to imagine life without my little speed bump and my beautiful little girl. Even when they fight...even when they fight with me...when they snuggle in at night and hold each others hand that's what we will remember most. Glad to see that you have a bit of "normalcy" happening right now! =)
Some days, calculating the time until bedtime is the only thing that keeps me from losing my mind. I think looking for moments of sweetness and contentment and love and joy is the way to go...because it truly is impossible to love each and every one.
(Maybe the poopie poopie pee pee song will stop now that the potty is being used?)
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